Augustus Gloop (song)
Lyrics Original (1964 book) Augustus Gloop! Augustus Gloop! Augustus Gloop! The great big greedy nincompoop! How long could we allow this beast To gorge and guzzle, feed and feast On everything he wanted to? Great Scott! It simply wouldn't do! However long this pig might live, We're positive he'd never give Even the smallest bit of fun Or happiness to anyone. So what we do in cases such As this, we use the gentle touch, And carefully we take the brat And turn him into something that Will give great pleasure to us all A doll, for instance, or a ball, Or marbles or a rocking horse. But this revolting boy, of course, Was so unutterably vile, So greedy, foul, and infantile, He left a most disgusting taste Inside our mouths, and so in haste We chose a thing that, come what may, Would take the nasty taste away. "Come on!" we cried. "The time is ripe To send him shooting up the pipe! He has to go! It has to be!" And very soon, he's going to see Inside the room to which he's gone Some funny things are going on. But don't, dear children, be alarmed; Augustus Gloop will not be harmed, Although, of course, we must admit He will be altered quite a bit. He'll be quite changed from what he's been, When he goes through the fudge machine: Slowly, the wheels go round and round, The cogs begin to grind and pound; A hundred knives go slice, slice, slice; We add some sugar, cream, and spice; We boil him for a minute more, Until we're absolutely sure That all the greed and all the gall Is boiled away for once and all. Then out he comes! And now! By grace! A miracle has taken place! This boy, who only just before Was loathed by men from shore to shore, This greedy brute, this louse's ear, Is loved by people everywhere! For who could hate or bear a grudge Against a luscious bit of fudge? 1971 film Oompa loompa doompety doo I've got a perfect puzzle for you Oompa loompa doompety dee If you are wise you'll listen to me What do you get when you guzzle down sweets? Eating as much as an elephant eats What are you at, getting terribly fat? What do you think will come... of... that? I don't like the look of it Oompa loompa doompety da If you're not greedy, you will go far You will live in happiness too Like the Oompa Loompa Doompety do Doompety do 2005 film Augustus Gloop, Augustus Gloop The great big greedy nincompoop Augustus Gloop, so big and vile, So greedy, foul, and infantile. "Come on!" we cried "The time is ripe, To send him shooting up the pipe!" But don't dear children be alarmed, Augustus Gloop will not be harmed, Augustus Gloop will not be harmed Although of course, we must admit He will be altered quite a bit Slowly wheels go round and round And cogs begin to grind and pound We'll boil him for a minute more Until we're absolutely sure Then out he comes, by God, by grace A miracle has taken place, A miracle has taken place This greedy brute This louse's ear Is loved by people everywhere For who could hate or bear a grudge Against a luscious bit of fudge? Note: On most prints of the movie, the lyrics in blue are omitted. Category:Charlie and the Chocolate Factory